Jonathan Keebler

Archive for the ‘Entertainment/Celebrity’ Category

R.I.P. MuchMusic

As if you needed further proof that the old MuchMusic is dead — as well as being completely subverted by CTVglobemedia’s MTV-obsessed programming — there’s something in these quotes from Much’s new general manager that suggests a disregard for the music brand that helped define the music scene of the 80s and 90s. I think the Toronto Star has it right in its article: MuchMusic shows its age.

“We will be doing absolutely nothing for the 25th anniversary,” says Brad Schwartz, senior vice-president and general manager of Much MTV Group. “Our core audience (the millennial demographic, with a skew to 18-year-olds) doesn’t care that we’re 25. It’s not news to them, only to the press and people who are no longer our audience.”

It’s just business, Schwartz asserts, and MuchMusic’s doing good business without its former raison d’être…

(photo by Shky)

Black Pearl: biggest asshat in ‘Kitchen Nightmares’ history

I just rewatched the episode of ‘Kitchen Nightmares’ where Gordon Ramsay tried to help the Black Pearl restaurant (a lobster restaurant in downtown NYC). One of the three owners, David, has to be the biggest asshat I’ve ever seen on ‘Kitchen Nightmares.’ I find, in general, the American version of the show is edited to show more drama than the UK version, but I don’t think it was clever editing in this case. It was hilarious to watch David on-camera talk about how much he hates the new food, then tell Ramsay he thinks it’s great. I was glad to hear they went out of business shortly after the show aired.

But the drama didn’t end there. Check out what is posted on the official website of the (now closed) Black Pearl Restaurant:

As it turns out, Gordon Ramsay is allegedly a philandering hypocrite. Maybe he’ll rot in hell, where he belongs!

Thank you to our friends and family for your support during the past four years, and thank you, God, for exposing this asswipe!

Even if you dislike Gordon Ramsay, what kind of thing is that to post on your official company website?! I hope Ramsay is laughing at them from his mountain of money somewhere, with his beautiful family, eating a fine lobster meal. :D

Black Pearl restaurant

Breakfast Television ‘coffee girl’ moves to LA

Remember the (hot) girl who was always making drinking coffee in the background of Breakfast Television (a Toronto morning show)? It looks like Angelica Montesano (yes, she has a name) picked up and moved to LA to pursue an acting career. I guess it’s too early to tell if she’ll pull an Amanda Walsh or a Rachel Perry, but either way I recommend going ahead and getting some back-tattoos just in-case. You don’t want a guest-spot on ‘Smallville’ to be your career highlight ;)

Angelica Montesano

Karen O wants me to see her vagina

I’m not sure why Karen O wants me to see her vagina, but she keeps putting it out there. I’m sure it’s perfectly nice but really, I like to be wined-and-dined a little before it gets to that stage of our relationship. Not that I can’t appreciate a good muff, but it’s like 1:30 in the afternoon, I just ate a Turkey Caesar from Quiznos, and it’s just not the right time. You can try again later, like maybe at 8pm, but still I’d like to start with a couple beers or something. You know, I’m not that picky, but you’re a pretty famous singer and everything, so if I could get some band pins or something. OH! Could you sing Maps for me, and replace the word “Maps” with “Keebler”? ‘Cause that would be awesome. Then I will totally check out your vagina.

Battlestar Galactica Finale in One Picture

It took all my photoshopic skills, but I have managed to compress the entire Battlestar Galactica series finale into one cultural artifact :)

battlestar galactica cave paintings

Piano accordion players turn me on

There’s still some debate about why exactly I like Irish singer Lisa Hannigan who performed on ‘The Colbert Report’ last night, but something tells me it has to do with her use of the piano accordion. There’s something about watching a beautiful Irish woman railing on that thing while she sings that I like. What can I say, I’m only human :)

UPDATE: Karen informed me that it’s actually an harmonium. “It’s an Indian instrument that’s kind of like an accordion, but sort of on its side.” I’m going to stand by my previous statement though, but say that harmonium players are also hot.

Lisa Hannigan

Does Emily Procter blink?

After I went into Grissom-withdrawl, I had to find a new one-liner-throwing-machine. Luckily, I think I hit the mother-load with Horatio Caine when I started watching CSI: Miami. I’ve been to Miami, and trust me, it does not look anything like that show. It’s more…well…shitty. But there is a gator farm in the middle of it, so it’s not all that bad.

Anyhow, what’s with Emily Procter on that show? Does she ever blink, because I swear I have never seen it in about 30 episodes that I’ve watched. Now, I have the rest of the box-set on-order, but it would really save me some trouble, and cut this suspense, if someone would tell me if she ever blinks. Thank you!

emily procter

Me like-a the Minka

I’m not sure what a “Friday Night Lights” is, but apparently it has to do with newcomer (I had to work hard to spell that with an ‘o’) Minka Kelly so I’m a fan. That can’t possibly be her real name though. Minka Minka Minka…It gets stuck in your…I wanna say head…Anyhow, ya.

This is the type of blog post that I’m sure newspapers love to point to when they talk about how bloggers are ruining the discourse in the printed media. Well feel free to respond in tomorrow’s edition, by which time I’ll have posted about 7 more entries about hot celebrities with cool names :D

minka kelly

What do rabbits like more than carrots?

I came across this hot mess called “The Rabbit Hump” while I was researching (and I use the term loosely) this post. If this song gets stuck in my head like before, I think I’m going to have to drown it in a bottle of Jack and some percodans.

The best part of this whole video might be the tags they used on YouTube:

Oh, and “The Rabbit Hump” dance. That’s really going to catch-on at the clubs :)

Can’t Resist Casey Carlson’s C***

It’s a well known fact that I can’t resist watching the audition episodes of ‘American Idol’. There’s something about watching Simon Cowell tearing horrible singers apart that I just can’t resist.

Anyhow, this season has one contestant that definitely caught my eye…along with most men. That really makes it more like a sick mob of pathetic dudes dreaming about this chick who goes to the same barber as Rod Blagojevich. Michael sent me these pics (or “caps” as I call them…what did you think I meant in the title, you sicko!) a couple days ago and I’ve been resisting the urge to post them. But at 1am, with a serious lack of bikini shots on the home page of Keebler/Blog, it was time to get serious and take action.

So here you go, interweb. Enjoy!

casey carlson