Keebler/Blog

You know what I love while I’m trying to make a purchase? A creepy-assed avatar telling me how I should do it NOW! How to make it even better? Make his eyes follow your mouse around. That’s totally not freaky at all. Thank you, oddcast, for giving people the ability to make me so comfortable.

I shut him up below but if you want to hear his sales pitch in all his creepy glory, check out this payment page. *shiver*

My girlfriend and I were thinking the other day about how my new dog, Sandy, is kinda like a crazy ex-girlfriend

• He sneaks into my bed while I’m asleep
• He wants to be around me all the time
• If I leave him alone, he cries
• If I ignore him when he’s being loud, he just gets louder-and-louder
• I wake up to him licking my toes
• He drinks my bath-water
• He goes through my garbage
• He pulls my used tissues out of the garbage and hides them places
• He sleeps in my clothing
• He likes to sniff my dirty laundry
• If I leave him alone, he’ll tear up my stuff
• He cockblocks my current girlfriend
• He won’t let me go out with my friends
• …and if I do go out, he screams and cries until I get home (and pees on everything)
• He hides in my house then jumps out at me

I was too bored after the Oscar’s to watch Jimmy Kimmel, but this is f**king hilarious!

LOL! I can’t stop reading these image macros! There’s a whole page of them! My favourites are the courgette and the puppy, but they were way too offensive to post here

(Thanks Dawn)

Guess who wins I want this bunny guarding my condo

(Thanks Dawn)

I would just like to note that Manulife Group Benefits rock (see below). On a totally separate note, you might not see me for a few days

WHY?! Whywhywhywhy?! WHHHHHHYYYYY?! WHY does this site exist? This has to be a joke…right? I don’t know anymore…At least it gives you lots of good advice for mating with dolphins. “You should love a dolphin, not because of the sexual relief they can provide, but because they are a unique animal.” True enough

Whatever you do, don’t forget the warning (I tried to censor it enough that it won’t totally offend you):

WARNING! In the considerations of safety, you should NEVER let a male dolphin attempt **** *** with you. The Bottle-nose dolphin ****** is around ** inches, very muscular, and the…force of ***********…would cause serious internal injuries, resulting in…possible death.

I’ve always wanted to know how to make “wedding electrodes” I finally can on How It’s Made according to my cable box.

How does Busted Tees produce these so quickly!?…and why are 2g1rls1cup everywhere all-of-a-sudden? I’m not complaining, because it’s a great video. Good, clean family fun. And yes, there’s no way in hell I’m linking to it from here. I’m already banned by Trendmicro